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H8RED OF THAT ASININE BEE!!!

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Angry McPisseron View Drop Down
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    Posted: 02 Aug 2012 at 2:37pm
Here are some ways that I've dealt with some of those pesky advertising mascots over the years:
 

"Honey Nut Cheerios. A flushing good part of this urine-tainted breakfast!"




"Honey Nut Cheerios. It's a Honey Of An Oooohhhh SSSHHHIIIIIIITTTT!!!!"
 
 
 
"Extra! Extra! Honey Nut Cheerios Bee dies in an apparent murder!!!"



"DAMMIT!!! IT WON'T GO DOWN!!!"
(This bee is a drone {male}, so I was at no risk of being stung {and subsequently envenomated} during bee disposal)

 

THE STUPID HAND & THAT ASININE BEAR!

The Honey Nut bee isn't the only stupid, asinine advertising mascot that needs to die. What about that mutated, malformed hand that sticks its own filthy fingers in your food (who knows where those fingers have been!) and that sickly sweet laundry bear that's aways eating socks in your dryer? These pictures show how I've dealt with the pesky creatures.


Hasta La Vista, you sock eating Snuggles piece of shiit!!


DOWN THE SHIITBOWL YOU GO!!

 


The only way Hamburger Helper should be served.

 
 
A few days ago, a friend of mine was shopping at Wall-Mart when he was attacked by that stupid distended yellow talking pus bladder they have on their TV commercials. In disbelief that the yellow smiley was actually going around in a Zorro costume, knocking shiit over, and madly slashing at price signs, my friend grabbed a tennis racket out of Sporting Goods and whacked that smiley good! It let out a slight squeaky noise, and quietly rolled into the Pet Care products section.

After it crawled away and died in a cat box, I ran to Kitchenwares, grabbed a slotted spatula and scooped the cat box.

I went into the employee's can, dumped the dead Smiley into the toilet bowl, flushed, and crammed it down with the toilet brush just to be on the safe side.
 

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regulus View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote regulus Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02 Aug 2012 at 2:48pm
LOLLOLLOLLOLLOL
Poiuyt Power!!!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Zach6848 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 Aug 2012 at 12:05am
The Hamburger Helper one made me lose it.
"Sometimes we live no particular way but our own."

Like westerns? Check out my recently published e-book: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00KXLXA9Y
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ad nauseous Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 Aug 2012 at 12:22am
LOL these are brilliant! LOL

Any more TV ad characters you'd like to get rid of? Question
One good thing about TV-you could always turn it off
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote DirtyD79 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 Aug 2012 at 1:25am
LOL These are hilarious. Knock that obnoxious bee down a peg or two. 
Mind on My Money, Money on My Beer
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote regulus Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 Aug 2012 at 2:05am
Originally posted by Ad nauseous Ad nauseous wrote:

LOL these are brilliant! LOL

Any more TV ad characters you'd like to get rid of? Question

Any Character from:

Generally
Excruciatingly
Irritating 
Commercial

Organization
Poiuyt Power!!!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Angry McPisseron Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 Aug 2012 at 2:21am
Originally posted by Ad nauseous Ad nauseous wrote:

LOL these are brilliant! LOL

Any more TV ad characters you'd like to get rid of? Question
 
Thank you!!! Big smile
I was thinking of those gosh darn-diddly-arn queer Keebler's elves and those gosh darn-diddly-arn queer Rice Crispies elves! DeadLOLDead

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote msmadz Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 Aug 2012 at 1:48pm
HILARIOUS!!!!!!!
Yes, I lost it on the Hamburger Helper one, too.
 
Great way to start a Friday!!!
The artist formerly known as Madawee



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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Angry McPisseron Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 Aug 2012 at 2:07pm

I've got a whole website devoted to battles between TV commercial spokespeople, spokesanimals, spokesthings, etc.

Let me just grab one that has the Hamburger Helper malformed talking hand as one of the embattled contestents:
 
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
ROUND 1: HAMBURGER HELPER HAND vs. GEICO GECKO.
This epic battle shall take place in a household kitchen. The kitchen is equipped with a double-bowl sink & garbage disposal, refrigerator, range, and numerous small TV infomercial appliances. The kitchen has a moderate infestation of piss ants, cockroaches, and rats.

The embattled contestants start by circling one another on the kitchen floor. Gecko tries to take first blood by scampering up the side of the cupboard and grabbing a serrated bread knife out of the knife drawer. He viciously slashes at the three-fingered Hand over and over, but every slash of the gleaming steel blade misses!! The Hand goes under the sink and pulls out a plastic garbage bag, and tries to asphyxiate the Gecko with it. Gecko chews through the bag and escapes! He skitters up the cabinet and across the counter, and grabs a Thunder Stick Pro blender. Gecko turns the Thunder Stick on, and attacks the Hand from behind! He drills the Thunder Stick's blade deep into the Hand's back, but Hand grabs a cabinet handle and pulls himself away. He grabs the knife Gecko dropped earlier, and cuts the cord off the Thunder Stick, permanently neutralizing the threat.

Now it's Hand's turn to go on the offensive. He reaches in through the open cabinet under the sink and grabs a bottle of Cascade automatic diswasher liquid. He flips the top and directs a powerful stream of the corrosive gel right at the Gecko, but only hits him in the tail, melting it off. Gecko quickly grows a new one, and hides behind the sugar bowl. Realising the Gecko is self-regenerating, Hand starts preheating the oven in preparation for Gecko's iminent immolation. While Gecko is cautiously peeking out from behind the sugar bowl, he is horrified to see Hand mixing a bowl of Hamburger Helper, and notices he took a marker and crossed out "Hamburger", then added the word "Gecko" on the front of the box. That's really bad news for our little lizard friend!!

Gecko gets behind a Showtime Rotisserie and kicks it across the counter, knocking Hand to the floor. He then grabs a bottle of Ronsonol cigarette lighter refill and sprays it toward Hand on floor, but misses Hand by just a tiny bit. Hand slips on the lighter fluid, skids right into a sticky rat trap, and becomes hopelessly stuck! Gecko then skitters down the side of the stove, flips the oven door open, then kicks Hand inside and slams the door; all while exclaiming in that fa6goty accent, "HAND HELPER... MAKES A GREAT MEAL!"

Once Hand stops struggling, Gecko grabs the bowl of Hamburger Helper off the counter, dumps it all over the burning Hand, and lets it broil for another hour and 45 minutes. Some quick acrobatics with a Swiffer Wet takes care of the mess on the floor, so nobody but you will ever know of the heroic battle that took place here this evening.

AND THE WINNER IS... The GEICO GECKO!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
 

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote insanity213 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 Aug 2012 at 3:31pm
hahaha nice pictures!LOL LOL Clap

They remind me of this Mad TV clip:




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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jimbo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 Aug 2012 at 4:27pm
Originally posted by AngryMcPisseron AngryMcPisseron wrote:

Here are some ways that I've dealt with some of those pesky advertising mascots over the years:
 

"Honey Nut Cheerios. A flushing good part of this urine-tainted breakfast!"

 
LOL Angry, did you really dump a box of ceral & a carton of milk in the crapper just to get that shot????
 
And I thought I went out of my way for a joke!!!!! LOL
 
Hope you didn't have to dump it all in there!!!!
 
Funny stuff!!!
 
Great news guys.... With the Air Hawk, flat balls are no longer a problem!!!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jimbo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 Aug 2012 at 4:29pm
Also.... if one hand was pouring the cereal & the other hand was poring the milk.... who pressed the shutter release button on the camera???????
 
Methinks you must've had an assistant.....
 
Great news guys.... With the Air Hawk, flat balls are no longer a problem!!!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Zach6848 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 Aug 2012 at 11:41pm
More importantly, in the making of that image, did you clog your toilet?
"Sometimes we live no particular way but our own."

Like westerns? Check out my recently published e-book: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00KXLXA9Y
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Angry McPisseron Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 Aug 2012 at 4:42am
Originally posted by Jimbo Jimbo wrote:

LOL Angry, did you really dump a box of ceral & a carton of milk in the crapper just to get that shot????
 
And I thought I went out of my way for a joke!!!!! LOL
 
Hope you didn't have to dump it all in there!!!!
 
Funny stuff!!! 
 
Jimbo, yes I dumped real cereal and real milk into a real shiitbowl, but I got them from a foodbank when that photograph was taken in 2001. The cereal smelled extremely stale and had a "sell by" date of sometime in the very late-20th century (1994 or perhaps 1995) and the organic suspension of female bovine mammary compound (milkWinkLOLWink) was quite sour (it wasn't yet curdled, but it did have a very unpleasant odour!), so instead of just throwing them away, I decided that it would be cute to make a funny picture out of them. SmileClapLOLClapSmile
 
As for having an "assistant" when taking that photograph of both the Cheerios and milk being poured into the water closet, the only "assistance" I had was the 10-second self-timer on the camera. Smile
 

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jimbo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 Aug 2012 at 4:47am
Originally posted by AngryMcPisseron AngryMcPisseron wrote:

Jimbo, yes I dumped real cereal and real milk into a real shiitbowl, but I got them from a foodbank when that photograph was taken in 2001. The cereal smelled extremely stale and had a "sell by" date of sometime in the very late-20th century (1994 or perhaps 1995) and the organic suspension of female bovine mammary compound (milkWinkLOLWink) was quite sour (it wasn't yet curdled, but it did have a very unpleasant odour!), so instead of just throwing them away, I decided that it would be cute to make a funny picture out of them. SmileClapLOLClapSmile
Glad to know you didn't waste good food!!!! Thumbs Up
 
Originally posted by AngryMcPisseron AngryMcPisseron wrote:

As for having an "assistant" when taking that photograph of both the Cheerios and milk being poured into the water closet, the only "assistance" I had was the 10-second self-timer on the camera. Smile
 
What, no tripod???? Confused
 
 
Great news guys.... With the Air Hawk, flat balls are no longer a problem!!!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Big Momma Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 05 Aug 2012 at 5:16am
Angry,you are a genious!
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