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This Just In! Late Breaking News

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MrTim View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 05 Jun 2018 at 5:03am
Jersey Shore Candles the hottest selling gift this season;  Reviewers say it "brings the smell of New Jersey right into your home!"
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MrTim View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 Jun 2018 at 5:17am
Miss America Pageant drops swimsuit competition;  "It's not like they ever got wet, anyway";  Plans to replace it with athletic pole-dancing also nixed 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 08 Jun 2018 at 5:16am
Exciting organic methane discovery made on Mars;  NASA: "We've found billions of years old evidence of bacteria farts!"
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 10 Jun 2018 at 5:14am
You get a twofer tonight  Big smile

Bulletproof backpack industry may be doomed before it can even start;  Schools across country beginning to ban backpacks in wake of school shootings

Woman eats partially cooked male squid, gets mouth impregnated;  Though she spit it out within seconds, the horny creature implanted 12 sperm sacs into her tongue & gums

(Full story here Shocked )

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/woman-impregnated-squid-after-ate-12654166
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 11 Jun 2018 at 5:12am
The first rule of Date Night Fight Club is that nobody talks about Date Night Fight Club;  Adding Valu-Rite to the mix also not a good idea


http://www.nwfdailynews.com/news/20180610/blotter-couple-go-to-buy-booze-get-arrested-after-beating-each-other-in-dollar-store-parking-lot
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 13 Jun 2018 at 5:15am
Statistics show that the teen pregnancy rate drops drastically after the age of 20;  Gender studies majors still confused why the same statistic remains at a steady 0% for teen boys
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 Jun 2018 at 5:16am
ABC to order new seasons of Roseanne, but without Roseanne;  Al Franken to be cast as title character as "Louie Anderson wasn't available"
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 17 Jun 2018 at 5:06am
Happy Father's Day! edition;  Annual reminder to deadbeat dads to pony up their back child support
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 Jun 2018 at 6:08am
You decide!  The scales of justice are equal:  Which one is the more stupid?


https://www.actionnewsjax.com/news/local/report-woman-shoots-husband-in-testicles-after-he-tries-to-take-her-air-conditioner/770435073?utm_source=fark&utm_medium=website&utm_content=link&ICID=ref_fark

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 21 Jun 2018 at 5:21am
Long forgotten by most & thought dead, Peter Fonda makes pathetic bid for attention;  Aged actor tweets nasty things about women & children, hopes to be Alec Baldwin's VP nominee
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Jun 2018 at 5:12am
Woman claims that drinking her dog's urine cleared up her chronic acne;  However, while she now looks good, she also has worms 


https://nypost.com/2018/06/20/woman-claims-drinking-her-dogs-urine-cleared-up-her-acne/?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 Jun 2018 at 5:36am
Canadian children being kept in cages after crossing into U.S.;  Canadian parents say "eh, so what, just as long as they feed'em while we're here on vacation"
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 Jun 2018 at 5:35am
New treatment announced for gambling addicts:  Gamblers can only bet on sloth races, which can take weeks for a winner to cross finish line;  "All of the anticipation and excitement is drawn out over time in one game, instead of a multitude of games with quicker resolution" says a prof
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 Jun 2018 at 5:24am
CNN claiming they have "the greatest ratings ever", but people not named "CNN" disagree;  Even This Just In! consistently beats CNN in the ratings

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 29 Jun 2018 at 5:35am
School participation up this year for Career Mentoring Day;  Many students get first hand job experience


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 30 Jun 2018 at 5:39am
California getting weirder by the day, may need to be isolated from rest of US;  Trump:  "We're going to need a longer wall, I tell you, much longer"
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02 Jul 2018 at 5:51am
Brooklyn Bridge reported stolen;  Man files police report, claiming that someone sold "some naive sap" a fake deed to his bridge
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 05 Jul 2018 at 5:28am
USA Independence Day celebrations over, travel advisory lifted;  British nationals no longer have to hide their tea

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 Jul 2018 at 5:35am
Climate Change entering new disturbing phase;  People freaking out when they learn that half the planet is getting hotter while the other half is getting colder, at the same time

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 Jul 2018 at 5:33am
Going to church can keep you out of Heaven;  Study finds that people who go to church live a few years longer than those who don't
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 10 Jul 2018 at 5:23am
Vicious bitches not limited to the human world;  Female Black Widow spiders often fake being lesbians to attract, kill (and eat) their female rivals

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 11 Jul 2018 at 5:22am
Thai cave rescue TV coverage gets better ratings than World Cup;  Belgium team so bad that bookies not taking bets they'd win against Thai kids soccer team in exhibition match
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 12 Jul 2018 at 4:47am
Trump to pack Supreme Court to 11 judges and create a SCOTUS football team;  RBG angling to be a linebacker

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Lowellchris Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 12 Jul 2018 at 4:53am
And safe for Fake Jamaican three card monte weed dealers ..
It grinds my gears
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrTim Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 13 Jul 2018 at 5:40am
Police arrest crazed drug-dealing criminal shoplifting in grocery store;  Yellin' melon felon now gellin' in a cell for sellin'
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