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Allegro Cookware

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Angry McPisseron View Drop Down
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Formerly AngryMcPisseron

Joined: 20 Apr 2008
Location: Fresno CA.
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    Posted: 07 Aug 2013 at 3:29pm


ALLEGRO COOKWARE
One piece of dialogue in this infomercial describes its content entirely: " If we were from Mars and had never seen a pot or pan before, we would have created Allegro from the start. (sic)"

Allegro is a new pot from the Wearever corporation, from Mars; a manufacturer known mostly for electric skillets and other low-end kitchen appliances. This product is a $400 set of unusual looking square pans and lids. The infomercial is hosted by a rather ordinary woman, and a man named Domimic with a funny voice; and consists of Domimic cooking several items in the pots, burning several other meals in them, and a few tape loops of "testimonials" peppered throughout.

KODAK MOMENTS:
This infomercial features some of the most shoddy and unprofessional camera work I've seen in years. When the consumer testimonials are shown, the camera jerks & wavers about as if the cameraman started his day with a few 40's of Olde English 800 malt liquor and some Valium teepz. Some of the shots even jump way out of focus for a moment, then go back in focus. If I were this infomercial's producers, I'd have this guy's camera bag checked for empty booze bottles and forged prescription slips.

Dominic, the male host of this program, just doesn't seem quite right. His voice was never meant for a TV program of this length. I can't put my finger on it, but something just isn't right here. Although he doesn't put on a dramatic act like the guy on the Rocket Chef program does, he still seems a little odd for some reason. I just can't quite pin it down.

Testimonials? You bet!
A number of women start this program off by bitching about why they hate their ordinary pots. They can't pour food out of them, they don't know how to use a colander or the pot's lid to strain, they piss & moan about their noodles boiling all over the stove, and they whine about their teflon nonstick pots. Several dramatic shots show some of these faults: a woman tries to drain the noodles out of a way-oversized pot using the lid, and of course, half the noodles end up in the sink. Another brief shot shows a pot just beginning to boil over, there's a shot of somebody pouring soup all over the counter, and a final shot shows somebody struggling to get an egg out of a very badly worn-out skillet.

Dominic and another man claiming to be on the design team also show off examples of ordinary pots "ruined" by metal spatulas. One specimen he holds up has a few little dings in the bottom and they say it's over three years old and needs to be replaced. Well of course it has dings in it you idiots! Its owner actually USED it once in a while!!!

One demonstration which Dominic performs involves dumping ruined food out of Allegro to show that it's really nonstick. Burnt rice slips right out; as do blackened scalloped potatoes and shrivelled oatmeal. These pots pretty much do the same thing as T-Fal's Ingenio Fat Free; or any other medium and high-end nonstick cookware. The lids are unique though, and may very well be this cookware's saving grace.

What's this? A problem?
Having finally seen this infomercial on a clear TV channel, I find they aren't telling the whole truth about Allegro.

Problem 1: The Messy Boilover. When a closeup of Allegro's lid shows it capturing boiled-over liquid, a careful look at the opposite side shows liquid spewing out and going all over the stove anyway.

Problem 2: Pouring. The pan does dribble when liquid is poured from it. This clearly shows when the soup out of the Allegro pot is poured into a bowl the way they demonstrated the same task with an ordinary pot.

Problem 3: Draining and Straining: The pan dribbles all over the counter again when Dominic tries to drain noodles with the lid. The producers attempt to divert your eyes away from that by the use of creative lighting. Didn't work on these eyes, thank you.

Problem 4: Loose handles. Closeups of some pots in the Allegro collection clearly show the hande NOT FITTING THE POT. A large gap between the handle and the pot could easily accumulate food and bacteria, and may indicate a problem with the handle's fastening or locking mechanism.

Problem 5: Non-stick that sticks. The pot's inventor displays an ordinary pan "ruined" by a simulation; Allegro didn't appear to fare much better either, but the camera refused to do a close-up on it. Even on the distant shot, I could discern the telltale reflection of bare metal in Allegro's bottom.

My biggest problem here isn't the pots themselves, it's the COST. Over $400.00 for 4 pots with lids! And they don't even do anything fancy, like cook your food ten times faster or support a party balloon on a column of steam. I think somebody is getting screwed here, and that person is the one who actually picks up the phone and BUYS these things for the price advertised!
Unless you're one of those people who pours all of the pasta down the sink or routinely dumps soup all over your counter or floor, I'd probably wait awhile before buying Allegro. At least wait until it shows up in the Fingerhut catalogue.

Because of the unprofessional camera work, and something about the host that's wrong, I'd have to give it 2 seats.
RATINGS change - because of the LIES LIES LIES, this production gets ONE BIG SNAPPING BUSTED TOILET BRUSH!!
Whats this?  A snapped bowl brush?

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